Beginnings -- Chapter 7

Two days later...

Eames lay on the exam table and watched Goren pace as he read the numerous pamphlets and posters that littered the exam room. Over the past couple of months he had gotten better at hiding what was bothering him, or maybe it was just because she hadn’t since much of him, but she could still see it there in moments he didn’t think she was looking.

“Bobby?”

“Hmm?” he replied, but continued to pace and read.

She sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Goren?”

He turned to look at her. “What?”

“Can you please sit? You’re making me queasy.”

He sighed and sat on a stool by her left side.

“Sorry.”

“I know. It’s okay.”

He continued to tap his fingers on his knees until there was a soft knock on the door. A moment later a red headed woman in her early forties entered the room with a smile and a manila file.

“Hello Alex,” the doctor said, then noticed Goren. “You must be the allusive father.”

Her tone was teasing, but Eames didn’t miss the slight grimace that went through Goren as he extended his hand to her.

“Bobby Goren.”

“It’s a pleasure to put a face to the name. Kate Wesson,” she said as she shook his hand, and then turned her attention to Eames. “So how are you feeling?”

“Fine…great even.”

Kate move to the right side of Eames and rolled up the hem of her shirt to expose the bump in her stomach. Goren watched Kate’s fine fingers push and prod at Eames’ flesh.

“And are you getting enough sleep?” Kate asked.

“Seven hours…at least.”

“Uh-huh,” Kate said as she began to thumb through Eames’ file. “Well everything looks pretty good, except your iron is a little lower than I’d like it to be. Nothing too serious, but you need to make sure your taking your vitamins, getting enough protein, and sleep. Eight hours…at least.”

“I’ll…work on it,” Eames said with a coy smile.

Kate returned the smile and nodded.

“All right, you ready to see the kid?”

“Sure,” Eames said.

Goren didn’t miss the conspirator-like smiles that passed between the two women.

He noted every preparation Kate made: the squish of clear jelly, the white flashlight like instrument pressed to Eames’ belly and then the throb of a tiny heartbeat.

Goren’s eyes shifted immediately to the monitor at the foot of the exam table and softened with awe. He propped an elbow up on the exam table and brushed a finger across his lips as he watched the shadowy figure.

He pointed toward the screen. “That…that’s the heart rate?”

Kate nodded and looked more closely at the screen.

“Her heart rate and it’s strong.”

Goren remained dazed as Kate turned off the machine and cleaned up Eames.

“Be sure to schedule your next appointment with the receptionist before you leave. They’ll also have a picture of the little one for you,” Kate said pulling down Eames’ shirt.

“Thanks Kate.”

“It was a pleasure, Alex,” Kate said. “And nice meeting you detective.”

Kate nodded her goodbyes and left them alone.

Eames began to sit up and Goren stood to help as she grinned up at him. He twined his fingers with hers and stepped back to study her.

He smirked. “You…you played me. You knew…this would make it…her…real to me.

Her grin grew wider.

“I have no idea what your talking about,” she said, trying to look innocent as a smirk crossed her lips.

He smiled and then leaned to kiss her forehead.

“Would it be all right if I stayed at your place tonight?”

“Yes.”

“It’ll probably be late.”

Eames nodded. “I have a spare key I can give you.”

Goren nodded and brushed his lips against hers.

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It was almost eleven before she heard her front door open and then lock again.

Eames lay on her side, faking sleep, and listened to his surprisingly light foot falls come down the hall to her bedroom.

She stayed still while he stripped down to his boxers and felt the bed shift as he crawled in beside her. He rolled over to face her and she fought back a smile, but lost.

“I already knew were awake,” he said.

“I would have had you if not for the smile.”

“It wasn’t the smile…you’re breathing…its different when you’re asleep. It’s softer…and you occasionally whistle through your right nostril.”

“I do not,” she looked up at him half amused and half disturbed.

“Y-yes you do,” he smiled and began to play with the strap on her tank top.

His fingers traveled down her arm until his palm rested flat on her belly. She placed a hand over his and he caught sight of her eyes. There was a softness in them mixed with happiness and sadness that he had never seen before.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Nothing…it just…that’s the first time you’ve done that,” she said as she directed her eyes down at their hands resting on her stomach.

She regretted her words as she saw the fear and guilt creep back into his eyes.

Silently she pleaded, please don’t retreat again. Not after we just got so close.

“I…” he started to speak, but she could see him fighting for the right thing to say. “I wanted to for awhile…but I…I couldn’t.” He let out a long sigh. “I really don’t want to screw this up.”

There it was the truth she had been waiting for.

“Bob—“

“I don’t want to screw her up, or you. You’re probably the longest relationship I’ve ever had and that’s not even counting the months we’ve been a couple…” he stared blankly at their hands as he continued to ramble. “…and now that I think about it I, whether consciously or not, I made sure that they wouldn’t last. I worked too much or didn’t share enough…and not because I didn’t want a family, but because I didn’t think I should have one. The way I grew up…I was always waiting for the bottom to fall out…I never wanted my children to feel that.”

Eames grasped his cheeks in her hands and forced him to look at her.

“She won’t,” Eames said with conviction, hoping to pour it out through her palms and into his skin.

“I don’t know how to be a father, Eames. At best my father ignored me—“

“What, you think the rest of us have some secret manual that’s been hidden from you?” she said with a faint laugh. “Listen to me. First off, thank you for finally telling me all this. We can work with this; worked past it…and secondly there is no one else I would feel safer leaving my child with.”

He knew she meant it and for the first time in a long time he felt safe.

He moved his hands up to cradle her neck and he had to kiss her. She welcomed his bottom lip between hers and felt his tongue glide against her top lip. They massaged and sucked at each other until finally they broke and rested their foreheads together.

He studied her closed eyes and sleepy smile.

“Eames?”

“Hmm?”

“Um…do you want to come with me sometime…to meet my mom?”

Her eyes shot open and she pulled her head back slightly.

“Really?”

“I…uh…would call ahead first…I don’t want you to meet her when she’d having a bad day, but…yes.”

“I would like that.”

She moved closer and pulled his lips back to hers.

“Aren’t you suppose to sleep,” he teased against her mouth.

She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Sleep can wait.”

She returned her attention back to his mouth and his hands began to roam.